Reflecting on 2015

We had one hell of a year. A lot of big ups and a lot of big downs, just like there always are but one thing is for sure – life goes on. Change happens. Every year we seem to forget that, and expect things to always be better, always be happier and always move forward. Because of that, we are more disappointed and see roadblocks as set backs instead of maybe divine intervention trying to get us back on the right path. There are a few things I’ve learned over the last 365 days, and I wanted to share with you so I hope you’ll appreciate and have gratitude for them, too. 

1. Sometimes you have to let go.

Ahh yes, Elsa said it best, but she has a great point. There is a painting I purchased earlier this year that I hung over my bed that reads, “Letting go requires more strength than holding on.” Change is inevitable, but it’s the fear of change that is paralyzing. You’re going to lose a job, get divorced, have to move – if you don’t experience hardships you’ll never truly appreciate the good in life. I’ve had my share of downs, but that’s what keeps me going, and I don’t regret any of them as each have proven to lead on to way more positive and successful moments in my life. 

2. Memories are sometimes better remembered in the moment. 

photo credit: Boston Globe via Getty Images

I was on one of my many travels this year (24 of them!) in the Pocono mountains when someone with me asked me to put down the camera and just experience the moment. They said sometimes memories are best remembered from the mind and not a photograph. We’ve become so accustomed to trying to document everything for looking back, but what ever happened to actually enjoying the now? When’s the last time you actually did? Some private moments I shared this year are some of my favorites. I remember them just fine, and I actually like the fact that in a world of transparency, there are a few secret moments that no one will ever know but me.

3. Trying new things is the heart of life.

I have always been an adventure seeker, that’s why I love my job – it’s rare that I have days that are ever the same. I get to create my own paths. All the time people comment and ask me how I do what I do – how? By doing. I choose to try new things and go out of my comfort level daily. It’s what keeps me alive and young. At the age of 3, Max has probably seem more of New York City than most native New Yorkers, and that is something I am proud to have provided him. Whether it’s finding a new hiking trail in the Hudson Valley among the mountains and river, finding the local food market in Barbados where tourists don’t typically go, zip lining in the jungles of Puerto Rico, or just spending an afternoon on the New York City streets people watching, I have realized how much pleasure I take in discovering life. 

4. You have to stop and smell the roses.

The other day I was walking down the street when I realized yet another cool old building in Queens was torn down to make room for “luxury housing.” As much as I love modern amenities, it makes me sad to see pieces of New York disappear. It reminded me that sometimes you really need to just stop and look around you and take it everything. Not to sound super sappy, but all we do is rush anymore. There is always somewhere important we have to be, and emails and Facebook that just NEED to be attended to on the way there. Look up the next time you take the subway instead of using your phone. Watch the people, how they interact, what they wear. When Max and I take the train together we love to look out the window and have fun conversation that engage the riders. Last week he was egging me on by yelling GO JETTTTS! GO STEEEEEELERS! Everyone one the train laughed and watched. As we exited, Max waved and say “bye, people!” which made the entire train laugh and smile. How often does that happen anymore?

5. Take care of yourself.

One of my clients is a young 69 years of age and you would never know that unless you were told. She runs around with me keeping up just like someone in their thirties, loving life, trying new things, and I can only hope I will be the same at that point in my life. I don’t ever want to lose my zest for life, and I am happy to say that realizing that now is the secret to success. 

I spent a lot of time in my twenties beating up my body, and am now spending my thirties fixing it. I haven’t touched a cigarette since I was pregnant (that was over four years ago!), I took up running (half) marathons as my new hobby, I love DoTerra Essential Oils, and eating better for myself and Max – which includes going vegan three days a week (everything in moderation, I still love meat, but just eat more plants). I also am proactive about my health these days and actually GO to doctors to make sure nothing is wrong with me. Thankfully for the end of 2015 I can say I have a clean bill of health, and at 34, I feel the best I ever have. Not only does this help physically, but mentally. I have taken time to myself to recharge and accept that it’s all part of the game. I don’t feel guilty to go on a girl’s trip to run a marathon in Baltimore, or spend a few dollars on a massage or manicure here and there. Max can’t enjoy life with someone who can’t keep up with him. 

6. Maintain your friendships.

Moving to New York City from Pittsburgh, becoming a mom – these were huge life changes for me, and I lost a few friends along the way, and made new ones. But sometimes distance grows. After being in a wedding this summer and spending a lot of time with girlfriends I had known forever but didn’t see much anymore, I realized I missed this piece of my life. Even though we all lived in different cities now and had different lives, we found a way to come together – running marathons. Now, maybe yours isn’t running, in fact I hate running, but I know that doing so keeps me close to my girlfriends. We group text and laugh and cheer each other on through our daily lives and runs, and vow to meet up to run two (half) marathons each year together. Not only does this keep us in shape (I mean, I am never giving up carbs so carb loading is now fun!), but it gives us away to stay in touch. We have a goal to meet, and then get to celebrate. Trust me, nothing is more liberating than crossing that line for yourself, have your friends there to support and cheer you on, and then be able to go out and celebrate your accomplishments. Whether it’s a trip or just a lunch or a phone call, find a way to keep your bonds with those who matter most. 

I also do this with my moms or “hens.” I have my pals Allison, Karen and Geanine and we travel together with our kids. Don’t get me wrong, it’s fucking mayhem most of the time, but it’s worth it. The memories we’re making, the kids are growing up together, and overall, both them and us are having the childhood and mothering lives we’re supposed to have. Remember those old school road trips you parents used to take? Or when you would go camping for a week in the summer with friends and family? I do, and I am happy to know Max will have that, too.

So, here’s to another year, another adventure. I can’t wait to see what 2016 brings us….