Pregnancy Perks

Well, I feel like I have been letting it know how many “surprises” will sneak up on you in pregnancy – jean sizes, hair color, heartburn….

So today I thought I’d let you know the pregnancy perks are starting to kick in and thought I’d give you some of the advantages that you’ll face while pregnant that you can NEVER get away with otherwise. Like remember when that cop pulled you over for speeding and you faked tears and said you REEEEEALLLY had to go to the bathroom? Yeah, it’s sort of like that. Only honest.

1. Expectant Mother Parking. Yay for this! Now normally I wouldn’t even care cause I don’t mind walking and getting my exercise. But lately, I have been huffing and puffing as this little man shoves my stomach further into my lungs, so the closer for me to waddle, the better. Last night Claudio and I attempted for the first time, our registry (which is a WHOLE OTHER POST), and for the first time in my life, we parked in the expectant mothers parking space! Which usually I avoided like the plague in my 20s as not to jinx myself. Oh how things  have changed.

2. Working From Home. Today, they were repainting and fixing an enormous hole in the ceiling at my office in the Upper West Side. I am pretty sure I could just SMELL asbestos pouring out as well, if it had a smell. Anyways, my boss being the loving mother she is herself, told me to go home immediately, and my doctor agreed. So my morning consisted of walking back home getting some exercise on one of these amazing first days of spring in the city. Sure, I’ll take it!

3. Free food. Everyone loves pregnant women. There must be something about us that people just can’t say no to. I mean, I guess it’s one of those things you don’t want coming back to haunt you – you didn’t help the preggo – look out KARMA IS COMING. But lately, I can get anything I ask for. Now, I’m not asking for millions of dollars here, but when I called to ask where my food was today that was an hour and a half late and stated that I was just really hungry and pregnant and waiting sadly, Seamless.com didn’t hesitate to credit me $10 on my next order. Score! And thanks Seamless for helping me get my food to show up! (If you don’t use seamless web to order food online, you’re missing out by the way!)

4. Assistance. From cutting lines, to seats on the subway (haha see previous post) people are always offering me something, and usually I don’t even need or want it, but it’s nice to be offered and poured over. I can see how it’s hard to bounce back after pregnancy. You get so used to free food, close parking, seats on the subway and Claudio rubbing my feet, I mean, come ONNNNNNNNNNN. No WONDER ladies get knocked up right away again and then start popping out shows like Nina + 84 kids. If you live you’re whole life pregnant, you’ll always be in comfortable clothes, eat whatever you want, have an excuse to get weekly pedicures and massages….hmmmmm. lol. jk. I actually like my size 4 jeans and a few glasses of wine. Like Arnold Schwarzenegger said… ILLLLLL BE BACK!