It’s been sunny and beautiful the last couple of days so I’ve had a hard time convincing myself to sit down and write something -but we’ve had a major breakthrough here and I wanted to share. At the sweet age of 2 1/2, my tough little toddler has finally let go of his “ba ba.”
You don’t always get to see behind the scenes of our life, contrary to what you see day-to-day, but this kid hasn’t wanted to let go. Day after day he wakes up and cries at night before bed for his coveted “ba ba.” I was convinced at 2 years old I would just take it away, and this summer like a champ, I attempted to go cold turkey with both the “ba ba” AND the binkie. (You see, he now has teeth and has bitten into the plastic making me fearful, so when he bit into the binkie, I told him they were saying goodbye). We had no issues – the binkie was gone and he never looked for it again. The “ba ba” was a different story. I attempted to place milk in 10 different drinking items, all of which were thrown at my head across the kitchen while he let out a heart trembling battle cry for his lost soldier – “baaaaa baaaaaaaaaa! Baaaaaa baaaaaaaa!” That cry still haunts me.
I caved like any mother with sanity, and said we will revisit this when the day is ready.
Now, I’ve always been a laid back, tough love mom. I don’t easily give in, have no issues saying no, and allowing him to win this battle was tough. I hate to say it, but just like many things I’ve watched Maximo grow into – he finds when it’s his time. So, I took a step back. I said, okay, it’s not hurting anyone, he’s not in school yet (lol), and we’ll just see how this goes.
Fast forward a few months.
Maximo loves to carry his “ba ba” by the nipple with his teeth. This resorts in it being cut off or torn. When I see this, I have to immediately replace the nipple because it’s a choking hazard. We came down to the last one and I calmly but sternly looked him in the eye and said, when it’s gone, it’s gone. He took off with it like it was just an average day, but a few days later, I saw the tear. It was beadtime. I ripped off the nipple and gave it back. I said, this is it! You can have it – but there’s no top.
He looked at it, tried as hard as he could to suck out of it, and then defeatedly, handed it back to me. I asked him if he was sure? He waved no to me and turned away. Was it really going to be this easy???? I figured the morning would be the true testament. In Maximo fashion, he woke up asking for his “ba ba” as usual. I handed him the one with the cut off nipple and milk. He held it, walked around with it for a couple minutes, and then handed it back to me. This process went on for a couple days.
Now he no longer asks for his “ba ba.”
I think the lesson learned here is that it was ultimately his decision. I kept warning him, and then was very calm about when it happened, but overall, he was the one who had to say goodbye. I worry that he will mistaken that in life, sometimes you can hold on to things until you’re ready to say goodbye, and this couldn’t be farther from the truth. However, I do think he has at some level conceptualized that some things don’t last forever. So for now, we’ll just leave it at that – I mean he is only 2 1/2 for hecks sake!
Till next time….
